3 Years Of Blind Friendship - 1 night to throw it all away (Part 3)

So continuing on from part 2

...The verdict? Not a good one. Michael was in his early thirties but looked a lot older than his years. He had an ear to ear beard that was low cut and reminded me the facial stylings of gay folk who call themselves bears. He also had a chubby face.

My mind was doing overtime. Was I being too harsh in my body language based the act that he was nothing like I expected to be, should I just go with the flow? I took a deep breath and suppressed my disappointment. So after some small talk and a Michael ordering himself a fish dish from room service, we were both sitting up on the bed over the comforter and Michael leaned in for a kiss.

The kiss totally caught me off guard, it was all tongue laced with one sided lust that I just wasn't feeling at all. To make things worse his kiss tasted of fish. The disappointment rose to the surface again and I knew what I had to do.

Pulling away from the kiss with an uncomfortable look on my face, I faced him and said "Look we can't do this, I'm just not feeling you like that" "What?" he replied. "Don't you even want to fuck me?", the desperation written all over his face.

I sat up on the bed, swivelling my feet to the ground and began to put my nikes on whilst Michael lay on the bed looking all defeated like the cat that had missed out on the cream.

"Mike, I think it best I just leave" I said in a somber tone. He nodded once. I gave him some dap and told him I'd text him when I got home and with that was out of the hotel and on the train home. I never did text and we haven't communicated since.

I'm a firm believer in never faking the funk, and not doing something if your soul isn't really in it.

3 Years Of Blind Friendship - 1 night to throw it all away (Part 2)

So... continuing on from part 1 

I activate the keylock on my phone and I sit and comtemplate whether the night is worth experiencing. Maybe a virtual friendship that had been one for so long was meant to stay that way, or maybe friendship was the perfect foundation to build on. I shower, freshen up with some Polo Sport cologne, and throw on some new clothes, its 8.15pm and I jump on the train to Marylebone. As I emerge onto Marylebone Road, I couldn't help but to feel nervousness in my stomach.

I take another glance at my watch as the Landmark Hotel came into view; 8.55pm according to my watch. I took a deep breath then headed into the plush building.

I made a beeline for the restroom as though I was a guest, quick stepping it through the traditional interior. This was the kind of hotel for the rich and famous, marble walls, a piano player on the mezzanine serenading business types as they lounged on their laptops or dined with their business associates. I looked in the mirror and thought to myself "I've been walking down this road for three years. Let's hope Michael doesn't disappoint!" my thoughts  were interrupted with the beep of an SMS message on my phone. "Come to Room no. 243"

I take the elevator up to the 2nd floor and knock on the door of room 243. A brown skin bearded guy opened the door. "Michael?" I asked. "Yup" he replied. With that I stepped into the room and shut the door behind me. The verdict?...

Part 3 coming soon...

3 Years Of Blind Friendship - 1 night to throw it all away

I first started checking for guys just after I'd taken my last GCSE exam. GCSEs are like SATs but in the UK to take them when you are 16. When I first started out all I needed was the phone sex, I would get off on the fact I was not the only person who liked what I liked even in fantasy after years thinking I was alone in my state of mind.

Then along comes Michael. This guy and I were on this chatline with an option to have a 1 to 1 chat. So we send messages back and forth then I kick off the 1 to 1 chat request. He was the 1st guy black with a level head on his shoulder that I wanted to get to know outside of the chatline. He was 10 years older, but had a down to earth and funny character so I did. At the time I was too paranoid to meet him so we used to talk from dusk til dawn about life. I didn't want anyone that was 'down' to know me and see me.

I guess I had this twisted paranoia that every gay person was out to get me and back then life for me was very sheltered. I had no job so my parents knew all of my friends, I wasn't allowed out past 10.30pm on Weekdays and on weekends I had to be home by 12am. My mum was a neighbourhood celebrity who regularly had people from the area report back if they saw me on Oxford Street or around Ealing in general. You know in with all the gossips and that.

Michael was my telephone advice go to guy. The good thing about the friendship was the he lived in Birmingham so it added a so near but yet so far element to our dynamic. He was a call away when I got my 1st job, got into my 1st relationship and got accepted into university so we grew really tight. So this year was our third year of friendship. The sheltered life is now a distant memory as the respect point for keeping my head in the books had meant that parents had finally given me the green light to be my own man.

When university was out for the summer back in May I got a call from him saying that he'd be working in London at a conference for a week and asking whether I wanted to put a face to the voice by going to check him at the hotel he was staying at. Off of the fact that we got to know each other off of a chatline there was always chemistry, so I thought this was the last piece of the puzzle so why not?

Beep beep... the text alert on my phone sounds, I read it. ''Meet me at the Landmark hotel at 9pm. - M"

To be continued.... (Part 2 coming soon)

Black Gold

I've been chatting it up with a Ghanian guy for the past three months and recently I thought I'd put the face to the voice as I was getting good vibes off him. So two saturdays ago, I freshened up and got my aftershave on so I was smelling good and headed to his place in Vauxhall.

Now whenever I go on a link, the psychologist in me, does a quick analysis of the guy's situation - 1. For me to assess whether I want to be a similar guy when i get older and whether I want to remain in contact after meeting up for the 1st time.

When I get to Vauxhall station, I call him from my T-mobile chip and he gives me directions to his place. I buzz the intercom and a mixture of anxiousness and adrenaline kicks in. What if he is ugly as fuck and I'm not feeling him, what if he is some pyscho? My mind is working overtime. That as they say is the thrill of the chase... the stakes are high and you are purely relying on instinct. The intercom sound that let's you know the door is open sounds and I go right in. 'Kofi' is standing in the doorway. 6'1 broad shouldered, dark skin sexy in a motherland kind of way. In my head I'd stuck black gold.

"Hey TJ!" he says "Come in". He then offers me a JD and coke. Whilst he is making me my drink, he talks about being in a council flat because of persecution back in Ghana for being gay, then going on to tell me about looking for a job as a chef.

Kofi then comes to sit beside me and hands me the drink. "So what do you like about guys?" He asks me in a hushed tone whilst stroking my free hand.

The feel of his touch made me hard and with that I set it off. or the next 90 mins we were getting it in on the sofa and on the floor. His head game was killing me! I ended up nutting in his mouth whilst kneeled on the carpet on the living room floor. There were some Johnsons baby wipes handy so I wiped my dick clean and gave him a hug and left.

For lust's sake, he was cool and all but not for me. A good release all the same though.

The hood days

When I was in secondary (high school) I was smart, but because the culture was that being smart made you a target for bullying (school was ghetto), to avoid having to beat them, I joined them. Chasing the hood girls around after school and cornering them and getting mine, rushing innocents because we could, and using a guy from the crew's mum's place as the spot to chat shit, watch sky and have mad house partys where the girls got HAD up.

We in the crew would square up every now and then to prove our manhood. I remember when it came to my turn and they put me up against this dude named Tariq. Now I'm a reserved character, but once I switch its a wrap. Sure enough when dude gripped me up by my chest, I saw red and started throwing him around until he gave up.

There were some really mad times though, like when guy named Dru threw a firework in the dinner hall, or when a next guy named Daniel beat up a bus driver because he would let him pay on the bus for free (try to pull an under 15 free flex).

I remember on GCSE results day when I got my 3 A Grades and they got their Ds Es and Us. I guess that was God's way of saying that a change needed to come. I replaced the hood circle with scholars and work people when I got my 1st job and made myself less and less available until my dealings with the crew was straight cordial.

I miss the days of reckless masculinity, but I'm glad I had had my priorities straight when I look back.

Lust in the Rain Pt. 2

Carrying on from part 1 . As I had given him the green light, he leaned in for the kiss and when his lips connected with mine in my head it was like fireworks; my soul properly felt alive. It started raining proper heavily so we took cover on the benches underneath the slide in the adventure playround. We were in our zone alternating between 1st and 2nd base. My ting was printed against my tracksuit bottoms and he let the head poke out, wet his thumb with his tongue and circled it around the vein near the tip of my dick, I can't even tell you how heavy it felt. After about 45 minutes, I let him know that it was getting late and I had to cut. He walked me to the train station and when I got home to my room, I feel onto my bed grinning teeth and happy that someone decent was checking for me.

We linked up a couple of times after where I would go visit him as a 'friend from college' and met his mum, dad and sister, but turns out he wanted to be on a whole 'playing the field tip' so I ended the sexual part of our relationship and concentrated on the friendship, so although I was a little pissed off to begin with, I'm glad things have turned out the way they did.

Lust in the rain

So I've talking with this cool guy, 21, head screwed on but like me he still lives at home. Anyhow a couple of days back we agreed to meet up in Mitcham after months of smooth convo and because these were unfamiliar endz to me, I got there an hour early. My guy, was still at work and I paced the streets to kill time. Before long it started raining so I copped a KFC mini variety meal to eat in to dry off and kill time. 45 mins later my phone rings and its my man. Its drizzling outside at this point but I'm wearing a hoody so the hood goes on and off I go.

When I saw him standing at the end of the Road, I was cheesing on the inside. Dude was even better looking in the flesh than I had pictured, rugged round the edges like how I like, but so as not to cloud the evening's events, I supressed those emotions. We dapped and talked about each other's days whilst walking into a park; he explained that he had family around so he would feel awkward bring me back to his. Chemistry was there so when we got deep into the park and climbed over the railings into the secluded adventure playground, where he used to play kiss chase with the girls that lived around the way.

I said boldly looking into his eyes with a cocky smirk, "What are you thinking?"

He responded "I'm thinking I wanna kiss you!"

To be continued....

What's in a name of a gay Street.. Pt 2

(Catch up with Part 1 here)

....But the free spirit in me was like FUCK it, just go with the flow.

Ended up in some gay pub (wiki it if you don't know what a pub is) where there were aged 30+ men taking part in a quiz

Diego saw a couple of people he knew and introduced me. He greeted them with air kisses; I greeted with a screwface, slanted eyes and a slight nod. After a quick drink we went onto another bar. The Bar was more upscale. I laughed to myself when the black bouncer said, "Do you know what kind of place this is yeah? Are you sure? Tell me then!" I replied "A gay one?" and on that soundbite he let me in.

We knock back a couple of shots, and order some spirits with a mixer in corner booth. I feel the drinks getting to me and start thinking about how a gay spot was not what I imagined it to be. Everyone just looked 'normal' bar a freakshows that I guess get kick out of people reactions to them. I caught Diego staring at me with a grin on his face, like he was just look at me and admiring. Next thing I know his lips are kissing mine and in opposed to how I told myself how I would react if events were gonna take a turn like this, I just went with it!

Diego has a charm about him that made me want to see the situation through until the next morning. So we finished up and caught a cab to his docklands apartment. The pad was nice, high ceilings and everything finished to a high spec.

Its about 3am at this point and I strip down to my boxers and get in the sheets. Round one kicked off spotaneously. His petit frame and passion behind every move made for a good session. Tight and clean just the way I like it. He fell asleep with his head on my chest. I feel asleep shortly after.

I woke up to him cooking me breakfast and going on and on about how great the night before was. He went on to talk about what we'd be doing on the weekend and in my head I decided it was a wrap, so after a 2nd session for closure's sake, I hit the road and then delete button on my phone.

5 days of a series of missed calls, unreturned voicemails and then bitter texts came and went before Diego got the hint. I felt a bit bad mind in retrospect.

I guess I was not where he was at with his sexuality. He was a very proud gay guy, no hushed conversations away from prying ears, an exclusively gay social circle of early 30 somethings and seemingly a familiar face in the nightclub scene. Conclusion? Good guy, but not for me.

"I'll see you later"

So earlier this week I met up with a guy I've been getting to know over the last couple weeks. Good looking, wicked sexual imagination, but the paranoia that I mention in a previous post about the mindset. Basically he views me not a TJ, down to earth, chilled and laid back and on the path to getting goals accompolished. But simply an easy on the eye link, who mentally he can relate to, possibly 'do a ting' with, then chuck away the disposable pay as you go sim card so there is no further means of communication. I get the nut, He gets the nut, the guilt kicks in and he can't reconcile the urge to satisfy a need that he has been brought up to despise with all that he is.

If you are cool with that then its all systems go, and in this case that is what it was. After all I needed a nut and I'd established enough to know that his issues aside he had a good heart, even if it was for one night only.



So the scene was set. He scooped me up from my area in a neutral spot. We drove for about 20 minutes until we reached our destination. Pulled up in a waitrose carpark after hours. I looked him in the eye with a wicked smile on my face and said "So what's good?" to my surprise he interlocked his hand with mine and gave me a look of vulnerability and fear but at the same time, his trust to take things to the next level. He then leaned for the kiss and damn it was a powerful one. The type that feels so right.

 This was playing in the background:



The next hour was spent just blessing each other and making each other feel good in the back seat. He taught me a thing or two also. After we both nutted and got clean, we sat in the back seat for 15 minutes in silent bliss. Whatever was going on in his life at this moment didn't matter and likewise the same with me. In an ideal world he'd be my type.

On the journey back he was talking about having work the next day and hIS mum probably being worried about him being out the house for so long. I laughed at the thought of hitting 22 and still having a curfew. When got to my drop off spot, he said "I'll see you later" and as much as I didn't want to say it, my response was "Let's not kid ourselves, no you won't". I stepped out and headed home. He tooted his horn as he pulled away.

True to form I called him a couple of days later only to hear the T-mobile automated message "The number you have dialled has not been recognised, please check the number and try again."

What's in a name... of a gay street?

When I was little, whenever I heard adults use the word 'Soho' it usually followed with the word 'poofter' 'gaylord' 'battyman'. So when I started experiences new sensations, partly because of the fear of seeing somebody that knew me or my members of my family and reporting my whereabouts and company I was keeping, going to Gay friendly bars clubs and restaurants is completely off limits. Kryptonite if you wanna look at it like that.

Then there was Diego;

South American consultant in his late 20s he had it all: looks, charm and good conversation so the scene was set. Nandos Baker St. neutral to him and me. Chemistry was there, conversation was chill so once we were once he suggested we go to a bar. In my mind I was thinking oh jheeze! the irony being the setting was the dreaded location I'd feared for the longest. SOHO.

Do I make my excuses and leave or, throw caution to the wind and run with it?

To  be continued...

Could you live life as a Secret?

Everyone has a fantasy scenario of a fella in the spotlight that they would love to get down and be cool with. Lemme paint this picture with words.

Let's imagine you hit up one of your favs with a verified account via Twitter, got them following you and vice versa, the conversation then gets heated via DM and before long you are exchanging numbers and chopping it up on the phone, relating about life and connecting on different levels on real shit.

Before long you get flown out to an exotic location, baller status; you are taken take of in every regard and the physical with you and said dude matches the expectation. Months go by and its honeymoon period unlimited; flown all over the World and making the most of the time spent together.

But then there are the issues: public image means dude needs to be seen to be dating / settled down, yet dude wants you to be single and available to be flown out 24/7 regardless. Said dude and your relationship can NEVER be discussed with anyone due to the stakes, so when you are going through shit, you are on your own. Said dude has no-one in his life to confide in therefore the arrangement 4 life would be permenantly cloak and dagger, not even on a 2 buddies on a going to grab a bite at mcdonalds type deal.

Given the opportunity would you date a celebrity?

Thoughts?

Why is it....

Why is it that when you are getting to know a new dude, they paint the picture of an angel, when really all dude had to do trust that I was confident enough to see past old ways?

Which brings me on to part 2 of the dude fucking with me and my friend. Read part 1 here.

So I was feeling like shit, firstly wondering why me and then second guessing myself even though the facts were as clear as day. I figured I'd straight up confront dude about it face to face, and look him in the eye whilst he was explaining his ass.

Fired off a text and got a response. 7pm KFC Marble Arch.

As I was walking up, I couldn't help wanting to go nuts and just inflicting blows to get the frustation out of my system that I'd allowed him to chip away and get my mind so open. 7.01pm I look in and see him standing by the KFC stairs leading upstairs.

"Wassup you good? Upstairs yeah" we dap. I explain I ain't hungry and he said the same. Once seated we got right into it.

Me: So when were you planning to show me that you were dealing with D?

Him: What? How did you... (At this point you could see in his eyes that the game was up) D is feeling me more than I am him and I don't know how to break it to him.

Me: So why would you drop the L(ove) word?

SILENCE

At this point I should have called it checkmate but this was the 1st time a bredda had fucked me over like he had and I had to see the inner workings on his mind so my response was:

Me: As far as me and you go were done on a sexual tip, but I don't mind continuing to get to know platonically.

Him: What? Even after knowing I'm still seeing your friend?

Me: Yup, I'm not a fan of drama so do you innit.

Him: Ok! So you haven't told him?

Me: Nope

To be continued...

Text from a street guy

Summer season is in full swing and I am getting to know a few heads. The ideal right now would be something light. You know someone to chill, lock lips, and jam with.

I was chatting to one guy, on the phone last night. We ended on the note that he'd text me something to make me smile.

And this is what he sent me:

"Yo T I cnt weight 4 u to hav me up, gripping on to my waste and shit"

Will be interesting to see how this situation pans out. He may not be the smartest tool in the box but who am I to judge LOL?

The main problem in dealing with discreet men is....

The main problem in dealing with men is the LIES and Paranoia.

If you are black and discreet and attracted to discreet guys , then nine times out of ten you've had to lie and be evasive. In conversations with your friends who know nothing about you being discreet, the 'hims' on your journey become 'hers' in conversation to avoid bateing yourself up. The 'hims' in the phone book are renamed to 'hers' and the 'hims' are given an different number to friends you haven't grown up with. Worse still if you are living at home.

To guys you lie about the area that you live in, you give a fake name so you can't be bated up. You think that everyone who is 'on it' has an agenda to bate you up. You don't feel comfortable talking about what you've done with other people although you are turned on talking about what you like.

The adrenaline and fear of the shame of everyone knowing your business and the permanent shame in peoples eyes that you will never be able to shake, should you be outted is mixed with the excitement of knowing that you are chatting to someone who on an attraction level thinks like you after thinking so long that you are alone.

Also if you are dealing with guys and you've never had a job before working with lots of people of different ages, if a friend from the ends, school or family member was to see you with an 'on it' guy, they would ask you where you know him from and the guilt would show on your face.

The family members have to be fobbed off that you are too busy for a relationship and your movements have to be cloak and dagger.

Then there is the selection process: You message someone who think is cool online, get to know him through messages then you get the email address and move it on to msn / yahoo. If he is bang on trying to get your number from the get go then you know he is too out there. He gets deleted. He goes 'out' every once in a while... he get's deleted, he shows you pics and looks clockable, he get's deleted. He's over 25 he gets deleted. He get's kept if he can relate to being confused, around my age and more just looking for someone to talk to, and looks easy on the eye.

Then conversation get's taken to phone level. If he sounds to soft or like he is trying to be something he aint he gets locked off. If he is level headed and consistant after weeks of conversation then we can talk about a face to face conversation so we can see what each other's vibe is like.

You meet face to face and then you either click or you don't; if I have to carry the conversation, you are clockable or your looks in reality didn't meet the expectation. I'll make my excuses and leave.

Its almost like there is a underground group of guys that are attracted to guys but are disgusted with the way those examples of people who are out that they have come across carry themselves to the point that they do not want to be associated with them in any way shape or form.

The chemistry either on the day of the meet or an occasion following the meet boils over and you let the lust and attraction take over. After that its either a short lived cloak and dagger arrangement that works for the both of you, or he will get too clingy and his calls, voicemails and texts ignored.

Its a lifestyle designed to drive a man insane. This was once my mindset, but I've evolved since then.

So you are fucking with me and my boy?

A couple of months back I got talking to one guy online. Before long he dropping his number and the dusk til dawn talks began. In my head I'm thinking, this dude has the potential to be a keeper. 2nd of Uni, personality and a sexual mind? I'd be dumb not to think otherwise.

During one of our talks I let him know that I wanted him to come check me and he came through the next evening. My man was nice! Brown skin, sexy lips and eyes, toned frame and perfect size. I was like "You know when we get back to mine its on?" He was like, I'll hold you to that. Soon as I put my keys in the door and opened my bedroom door, I pinned him against the door and kissed him down. It was a wrap from there as we moved from the floor onto the bed. He rid the dick like a pro and I had him up in mad positions. After round 1 the room smelt like sex; all musty, not to mention that there was shit on the condom :-( . Window got opened for air and the bin got emptied.

We take a break and player Street Fighter on the Xbox and I start to feel horny again, so to up the stakes, I told him that the loser of the next fight would have to suck the other's dick. He lost and round two kicked off after which we fell asleep.

I walk him to the train station the next day and dapped him goodbye. Few hours later one of  my boy calls m up and is like, "Yeah I've been seeing one brown skin dude with sexy lips and eyes, toned frame and perfect size from east for a couple of months. He told me he loved me a couple of days ago."

I was like "Bruv, I'm happy for you". We then talked about general boy stuff before ending the call. Started to think about it and I was like my in mind: My boy's new interest and mine sound alike. Then the light bulb moment came to me. ITS THE SAME FUCKING GUY!

To be continued...

Part 2: Dual Situations

So I talked about a couple of situations that were popping off a month and a bit ago. The latest? Ended up locking off both situations.

The musician I ended things with because although the physical was on point, mentally my man weren't saying much to maintain my interest, so it was a case of where the physical started to wane. Had some fun times though. Feel a bit badmind though because when I ended it, I said it was because I was bored and I could tell after that he proppa took it to heart.

Second scenario I locked off because the situation was draining, with him arranging things and not following through, telling me shit that didn't add up... all of that shit. I am a guy with little patience so as soon as I start to see a pattern despite giving you chance after chance, its curtains. I saw one and that was all it took.

I'm gonna take a dating time out and concentrate on other stuff. Things always happen when you least expect them to right?

But if you finding him on bgc you lose him to bgc. That's the way it goes

I was dating a guy for six months. Met him through BGC. Usually I don't give BGC members with their photos available for all to see my time as it instantly screams been around the block and I don't give a fuck who knows. I'm more about the profile and getting to know someone through their words. This guy has topless but faceless snaps and a good profile.

After a few messages back and forth and msn messenger conversations later, we started the dusk til dawn talks and eventually caught up in Green Park to put faces to names. Day was a thumbs up. A month later I ask him if he wants to make it official. He agrees.

So wtf did he have a bgc still that he was logging onto daily even after we were 5 months deep? I confronted him about it and his line was that he "Used it to make friends" and that it was like the brother 2 brother version of facebook.

I weren't buying what my man was trying to sell me so it was a wrap from me. We're still good friends though.

Do you believe that if you find him on bgc you lose him to bgc?

Anyone?

I know I know.... its been a while

Ain't posted in time.

Its mad. All these minor situations have been popping off. And I'm at uni now. LOL. So been dating one musician; not exactly God's gift looks wise, but he more than makes up for it in personality. Also been chatting to an IT guy fresh out of uni.

I like the fact that when you are dealing with older breddas, they have their shit together so there is none of this pacing the streets nonsense with peeps my age with little or no ends.

1st situation popped off after we talked on the phone for two hours; this was the 1st convo as well. We proppa clicked and man was telling me he was just finishing work in West. So purely off the vibe I went to link him. We walked and talked for ages and the chemistry was obvious. Ended up on Southbank around 1am. I did a 360 and it was just me and him. So I said, I dare you to lips me. And he did. My man melted me. It felt like he weren't just kissing my lips, he was kissing my soul. Its was mad. I got home around 3am and went sleep with a smile on my face.

2nd situation now was more drawn out. I had to gauge the situation more cos my man said he goes out and them things there usually send the alarm bells ringing in my head. We talked everyday for about six weeks before I felt sure enough to see this bredda in real time. Met up in Elephant & Castle and went Tesco for some snacks and drove around South London, talking and vibing. Pulled up in one park now and he starts billing a spliff. He puffs I puff and he starts giving me head. It was live. so much so that I nutted in his mouth. We're chilling again now and have probably been in the park for a good couple hours at this point, all mellow and shit. Police sirens start blazing and my man is asked to step out the car. Police did a car check and it was cool apart from the fact dude try give me a fake name. Truth sure did come to light!

To be continued...

Two breddas in one day!

OMDs. So basically was on BGC and got chatting to two breddas separately and drawed both numbers after getting them to show me their pix. Peng tings. Anyhow, chatted to the 1st one who seems cool, thuggy but a bit of a waste man. Taking about how college is long and them ting there, not working and still living with mummy dearest convo was about an hour long. 2nd one now is holding down a retail job getting more than me :-( was just so heavy. We just proppa connected about life and that. Anyhow they both wanted to link down west, so true I weren't working. I said cool. Set the times 1 hr apart and said to both it would be a simple faces to names ting and take it from there.

1st one now, linked at Oxford Circus then went to the park behind John Lewis and jammed. Bredda was a little soft for me as I like men to be men, nose pierced to add insult to injury. I asked if the face matched to the personality and he gave me the thumbs up, talking about how they were on whatever I was and that the ball was in my court. He threw any chance of that out the window when he asked if I wanted to go to a gay club. A fucking chi chi rave? Is he mad! 17 and my man wants to potentially bate me up? Allow that. I walked him back to the station after 45 mins, spudded him then cut. I laughed to myself as I scrubbed him off the list in my head.

Link number 2. Meeting point Marble Arch. My man was a petit buff ting, cornrolls freshly done and easy on the eye. Went to KFC to grab a bite where I told him I liked his French Connection hoodie. Asked him what he thought of me, and he was like yeah, you get the thumbs up. Can't say I weren't smiling cos I was. There was potential finally for someone to chill with. After KFC, we walked for time down Park Lane and sat in Hyde Park on a bench. I looked at man and was like... you are proppa heavy you know. And he was like safe. Then I was like, do you want this day to end on a good note and he was like yup. I then did a quick 360 look around, it was about 7pm at this time and the coast was clear so I gripped his hand it was a lipsing ting! Walked him back to Marble Arch station and said to him to ding me when he got home. BRAP!

All good things...

After nine months. I decided to pull rank and cut ties with the Trini. It was one of those ones where you fall out of love and you are in just for the sake of being in a relationship. We don't speak anymore either because I think that just makes things easier.

I put myself back out there after two weeks and woy! Bare stories.

Met one bredda from North who wanted me to bang him out in some secluded park in my ends. He was buttaz but could have held a bang if it weren't for me coming unprepared. The idiot gave me head and stratched the tip with his braces which stung like hell.

This brer then gave me a number to his bredrin who I linked and did a ting with after jammed on Oxford St. for a hot minute getting to know each other face to face after talking on the phone from 8pm-8am the night b4. God bless Freetime 3000.